What to do with an inappropriate student?

I have been teaching nude yoga clients for a year now. One of the most common questions I get is if I offer “full release” at the end of the session. Living in Puerto Vallarta, I am no stranger to this aspect of sensual practices. There is also the men’s nude tantric movement wherein many teachers will facilitate such activities. For myself, I decline such class offers (and student suggestions). I lose approximately 80% of enquiring because of this. Perhaps I am off a bit now, I have become quite well known and am running a weekly class in Vallarta that is full. Be that as it may, I feel I am direct with my students and online that I will only be teaching a yoga class.

It seems even with my straightforwardness, I still get students who feel comfortable enough to private message me suggestive comments. Not necessarily about having sex with me, but of their own sexual desires. In general, yoga instructors do tend to receive emotional openness from their students, so I normally respond with a dry calmness to allow them to feel recognized, while not leading them on.

I decided to stop seeing a client several weeks back, when I was invited up to the apartment for his practice, rather than at my place or the gym. Not because we went up to the apartment. First, he never informed me we would be going up there. Then, he referred to his bedroom as his (although he has a partner who was out of town). At one point during the session he smacked my penis playfully. I was shocked and perhaps should have left, but I decided to carry on. At the end, he offered a bubble bath a champagne. Platonically, of course. It turns out his partner was on ski trip, and that day it was his 22nd year anniversary. Or so he claimed. My 300% increase in pay for that session was because he wanted to thank me for all my hard work (pun not intended). I’m sure it wasn’t to try and soothe his embarrassment for the text messages from the previous evening. My response to him is below.

“Hi X. Thank you for your time with being a student of mine. I apologize if I have given you the wrong impression, but I am not comfortable with an overtly sexual teacher/ student relationship. I realize that naked yoga itself lends to being a free and open experience, however, I hope I have made it clear that I do not participate in sexualized activities with my students. Being in the seat of the teacher can be misused in this manner, which I am fully aware of, therefore, I set boundaries to protect my students from this. I also have to set boundaries to protect myself. I am unable to teach students who do not respect those boundaries, either in person or via text message. I hope you can understand this. Thank you.”

Perhaps I dealt with this incorrectly. All I can say is, boundaries are not only allowed, but should be encouraged.